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I find myself so depress in the last few days. Especially times are counting down to 2008. In 2007 I didn’t seem to achieve anything….. Yet I lost a lot of things including the people I loved and care. Time can be a good medicine to cure your pain but it can turn to poison as well (if you take for granted). Losing her is the pain and the shame of my life. I need to do something to make myself numb and shameless. I know it won’t happen but at least I can try to find a way to put them somewhere inside my Stomach and shit them out.
   
But every time people keep telling me that I’m still sad or ask me if I’m still sad. They just make me think of the pain and the shame again then I will really feel sad again so STOP ask me if I’m still sad….. just like Jessica told me. “If people keep telling you Jusco got sales, even Jusco no sales you also think got sales and go buy”.
   
Never thought that I actually lost her like that and also didn’t think that I will be alone for this long. Just like my mom keep nagging me “all your girls’ friends is just friends then which one is your GF?” But she never knows that her son is just a loser, a useless guy. A guy that lost his girl to another guy, a guy that dare not to express his love to the girl he think he might likes, a guy that still single in his late 27th (turning to 28th).
   
I think is easier for me to fall in love to someone but is hard for me to tell the person I wanted to be with her after my last failure relationship. Wonder if is because I scare to lose another one I love or I just think I’m not good enough to be with her. My friend actually shares with me about this “When a relationship start it will be just need 1-10% and then it will grow to 100% after together. If can’t grow to 100% then only break off. So if you wanted to wait till 100% only start the relationship then it won’t happen.” Maybe I think and care too much, should I start to look for the other half now? But I seriously enjoy my single life now…. Sigh me myself also don’t know what I actually want. Or maybe should I be really rich 1st then only allow to have a GF.
   
90% of the rich people are because their parents are rich. 9% of the rich people are because they do not have any family commitment or the family allows them to take the risk so they become rich. 0.9% of the rich people are because they are lucky and got the chance in the right time. 0.1 % of the rich people are because they won lottery. Seem like I only got less than 1% to be rich hahaha meaning 99% I will not have a GF lor? Oh no……..
   
When we are still student, our love is very innocent (you love me, I love you). When we start work, we want a stable income only start thinking of marry. When we got a stable income then we will think that want to buy car and buy house only marry. So we keep wait and wait till 3rd party come into our relationship and steal him/her away from us. At the end, the one who we marry to the end of the day is not the one we use to share all the sad, happy or all sort of the feeling in our past few years.
      
A message for the girls:
If he is the one you think can spend your future with, don’t wait for him to own a house, car or saving 1st then only want to marry him. As in the reality if one day he got all of them, he will have more seduce from the outside world. Sad to say that if the guy got all of this, I don’t think they still need an old girl (30s++) like you. Since he can get a better girls who are more Pretty, young and sexy girls. So by then the bride sure will not be you. So if he is the right one, even he doesn’t have house or car yet but he is very ambitious. Then he got the potential to give you a life that you won’t suffer. Even future he wan to divorce, you also can get a better $$ haha
   
A message for the guys
If you really love and care about her please don’t let her wait too long. As it will be nice to have her accompany you and fight for your career and future (be the woman behind you). Unless you have other plan, else don’t let the true love wait for too long because time can poison and grind off your truth love. I know it sound scary or you won’t believed it. But look at me; I am already the best example for you. Good luck Brothers!!
    
We tend to take things for granted after having it for a long time. But don’t let the true love wait. Tie the knot before true love fades away as times goes by, unless you don’t feel like married. Let’s forget about the unhappy 2007 if you got any. Because New Year New Hopes!! Happy New Year!!! 

This entry was posted on Friday, December 28th, 2007 at 9:33 pm and is filed under Feelingssss. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.